Whose Business is it?

Doodle of grains

“Mind your own business.”  This phrase could be perceived as rude (context and tone would give a clue), but not necessarily. It comes down to facts. I have my business, you have yours. Conflicts can arise when we cross boundaries.

Sometimes, people make other people’s business their own. Why? Because they are judgmental, unhappy, uninformed, or just fearful of change.

Case(s) in point:

This year, I have decided to pursue learning how to draw and paint. I was not expecting comments like, “Why are you taking a class? Just draw! You don’t need a class, that’s silly.”

I also decided to stop doing a lot of extra volunteer duties at work. Response: “But you’ve always done (fill-in-the-blank).” 

These responses are generally directed toward women, by the way. I rarely never see men at the receiving end of such remarks. 

How to react? Just smile and ignore it. Listen to your gut and do what works best for you. As Eric Barker says, the first step to pursuing what makes you happy is to define it for yourself!


Speaking of grains (sort of)….

Did you know Doritos is making “lady friendly chips“? (Washington Post)  Read the article, Maura Judkis is hilarious.

An excerpt: 

What do I like about chips? Hmm, I guess I like how they are small and petite, like me! I like how the bags are shiny and have bright colors. Though I know that chips are not technically meant for Ladies like me because their bags are never pink. If only there were chips that came in a pink bag, so I would know that gentle Ladies like myself could consume them with dignity!

Maura Judkis

5 thoughts on “Whose Business is it?

  1. My wife HAS to take classes. No gender bashing, but I think that’s a female teacher thing. Someone with a certificate or classroom of their own is somehow “qualified.” Whatever works. The other key thing? Everyone, men and women alike, think they can “guilt” women into doing something. “Why” is the big question. Men can say “That’s it” and walk and everyone figures it’s etched in stone. Back to why women are perceived as malleable? Probably because not enough have taken a class in “Weren’t you listening when I said no?” And then, according to psychologists, there’s the background noise of a woman is less likely to kick your ass for hounding her, which is a direct derivative of bullying, and although subliminal, is pervasive. Change that and you changed the world.


  2. love the grain drawings – when I used to teach elementary art classes – our students practiced “line design” with similar drawings- they made vines and vertical lines and then designed them out with unity, thick and thin lines, and their essence.

    and I like your point about going with our gut – but also taking control of what we do with our time – 🙂


      1. how cool – I enjoyed teaching elementary art but I got burned out – -but part of it was my fault because I sometimes do to much (part of my wiring) but also it was just a seasonal adventure for me as way to use my teaching background and explore a topic I was crazy about.
        I am still loving art – but glad to not teach it anymore – 🙂
        and side note – maybe this is why I enjoy sharing your posts with drawings and thoughts – there is a purity to your posts – and what I mean by this is you just share in a non-competitive way and then have that personal feedback or some rich quote or thought.
        and now it is clear as to where some of that comes from – an English teacher – right on.


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