Create something today even if it sucks. Love it.
My favorite children’s book series is Frog and Toad. I’ve always loved the simplicity and hilarity of the stories and it dawned on me only recently that perhaps Frog and Toad were more than friends. Lobel, author and illustrator, came out to his family pretty late in life and then died from AIDS. Everyone needs to accept everyone for who they are. Why judge others?
Which brings me to a comment my husband made to me this morning. He was looking over my shoulder, watching me draw the frogs.
“So when are you going to draw your own things?”
“I don’t know…the things you like.”
“I like what I’m doing. I have drawn things on my own and they were pretty terrible. I’m still learning.”
“Just draw your own things.”
I understand what he’s saying. And I have wondered if I’m playing it safe by drawing out of a book, but I really am a beginner. My goal is to practice drawing until December 31st and then try my own “things.”
And that is when I will make my leap!
I’m asked how the girls are taking the impending surgery. Here are their words:
June 12, 2010
-My mom is having surgery on Tuesday. I’m a little bit frightend but mommy said she would be alright. So, Ava and I have made a little menu for my mom with all different food and drinks when she’s in her bed. Her friends and our relletivs are coming over and helping us. I’m going to miss mommy. But when she’s up and around were going to play lots of board games and do math puzzles .My mom has done so much for me in the past that I’m not going to realy be used to all these people being with me.
June 12, 2010
My mom is having surgery on Tuesday.
I gave her my zu zu pet so she could press the nose and it would make a noise so we could come running to her. We made a menu for her so she could pick what food she wanted. If needed anything more she would tell us. There was coffee on the menu. Diet coke, water, and many other things. I feel a little scared because my mom is having surgery. But my mom is always brave. I will have quit violin for a little while. But till my mom gets better we have to go back to violin.
I am grateful for the amazing outpouring of love, support and encouragement I am receiving from friends and family near and far, and from complete strangers I have met online via friends. It makes me want to be a better person.
I’m asked,”What do you think you are supposed to learn here?” Although I believe everything happens for a reason, I don’t think I have led a life of unhealthy habits I need to ameliorate, nor have I sustained any toxic relationships. I don’t think this is a wake up call, because there is no place in my life where I need to realign my actions to suit my goals. I do, however, feel a renewed sense of appreciation for people in general, for the importance of health and responsibility. I always considered myself to be a strong person, but I’m having my mom sew a giant “S” on a blue nylon shirt after my recovery. Willey is making the cape.
On Friday, I had a 9am appointment with my plastic surgeon and a “check engine” light came on in my car. My first thought was, “On top of everything….my classes, and my surgery … my car now?” I was in Scottsdale and wondered if it was safe to drive. I completed my appointment (they took the “before” pictures and had me sign papers acknowledging all the risks of surgery, including infection, asymmetry, the need for more surgery, etc.). Suddenly, I felt as if I was being challenged. Someone or something was testing me to see when I would break. I will not break!
So I go home, find a mechanic with great reviews online, pack Josie’s swimsuit and towel, go to the mechanic, learn I have to go to a different mechanic sometime next week (it’s probably the o2 sensor), pick up the girls from summer school, drop Josie off to her playdate, have a date with Ava at the mall, go home, make dinner, get ready to go out with some friends and chat with the husband before I leave. I had a wonderful evening talking and laughing with a group of strong, beautiful women.
“Life is what happens to you when you’re busy making other plans.” John Lennon