The truth is, advertisers are always gathering information on you. When you shop at Target, Walmart, online retail and the grocery store, they collect your data and then you get like-minded coupons and ads in the mail (real and virtual). Once in awhile, they go “phishing” and send you baby-related items. Why? Because it’s the biggest moneymaker in their business.
If you’re having a baby, you need all KINDS of items and new parents are generally too sleep-deprived to drive further for a good deal or to pay attention to reduced items. Also, if you’re running to the store to get diapers, you might as well stock up on wipes, ointments, formula and onesies because who knows when you’ll get out of the house again? Retailers know that once they have you in the store, they HAVE you.
So. They’re phishing.
But, no babies here.
Go fish!
Our school just held Student Council officer elections this week. Classes voted yesterday and we identified our winners by the end of the day.
One thing that struck me throughout the week of campaigning was how CLASSY the kids were. These were 12 and 13 year olds. They wanted to be school President, Vice President, Secretary, Historian and Treasurer. Each one made posters (most decorated them themselves) and they were funny and witty.
NONE called their opponents names. Instead, they focused on the positive: they shared their visions of making our awesome school even better. They wrote speeches. They were nervous wrecks as they recorded them and they did it despite knowing the entire school would see them on the broadcast system. They did it, dreading the fact that by running for office, they left themselves vulnerable to criticism and defeat. I wanted every one of them to win, but of course, that’s not possible. I was excited to announce the winners, but I also dreaded breaking young, hopeful hearts.
The candidates were an eclectic bunch: nerds, athletic nerds, new-to-school kids and popular kids. The popular kids didn’t always win.
Each candidate focused on giving the student body what they wanted. They promised to listen. They shared personal information (“I have two sisters and a dog. I love watching movies and eating ice cream.”) They were so scared, that a few shared how nervous they were giving the speech DURING the speech. One of the candidates sang her entire speech acapella. They read their qualifications and it sounded like a list of Over Achievers Anonymous: Science Fair winners, Eagle Scouts, Straight A students, Star Soccer player, and on and on.
I don’t doubt that most of our American Presidential candidates really want to help America. But I wonder where our election process is going. Billions of dollars are spent on campaigns for an election that has been named “A Race to the Bottom.” Certain candidates have made allusions to gender, sexual body parts and trophy wives. They have mocked each other’s intelligence and looks. They lie and disregard fact-checking. In my social studies class, I wanted to utilize this year’s election in the classroom by taking candidates’ speeches and having students analyze them. To my dismay, I couldn’t do that (in a bipartisan platform, anyway). Must of what was bantered about was X-rated!
As I spoke to the candidates, I expressed how extremely proud of them I was and how I wished that adults could handle their campaigns in the same smart and mature way. They smiled. They knew what I meant.
I really hope that our young students grow up and remain full of enthusiasm and integrity. I have faith that they will.
I am a proponent of children focusing on one activity as opposed to jumping from one kind of lesson to another (last month, karate, this month, golf). I have two kids who tell me they are grateful for their expertise on violin and would not have it any other way.
But I wanted to ask other children their thoughts. This week, I quizzed 90 students. The most passionate answers came from children who have been taking lessons in something since they were three, or four, or five. They are proud to say that at age eleven, they have six, seven or even eight years of experience in dance or gymnastics or violin. They hold their skills dear to their hearts. One sentiment kept coming up: “My (activity) is part of who I am.”
Students who have started and quit various activities gave lukewarm responses, “Yeah, it might be good. But I like that I know how several things work. I don’t know. I suppose it might feel good to be really good at something.”
I am not sure this is a one-size-fits-all practice. Perhaps some children have a bigger need for exploration and experimentation. However, I do know that perseverance and mastery require a lot of hours. Through competitions, auditions and practice, young people learn how to handle disappointment and setbacks. They open themselves to “failure” and they become resilient. They gain confidence.
One of the writing prompts to my students last week: Think of something you must do. Maybe you have to do a chore. Now, put it in a sentence. For example, “I have to take out the garbage.” Make it a true sentence. Now, replace the words “have to” with “get to.” Do you see or feel a difference?
One of my fifth graders wrote this:
“I have to do the dishes. I GET to do the dishes. I have food I get to clean off the dishes. I ate food with my family last night. My dad, my stepmom, my brother and I talked and laughed and ate food and then I got to clean the food off the plates. I am really lucky because I have food to eat. I have a family to love. And I get to do the dishes.”
DC Metro – Red Line
A young couple —
girl-woman and boy-man
Tilt their heads toward each other
Eyes, love-gelled
Lips, upturned
Ever-so-slightly
Hearts and bank accounts light
Life is love-centered
Their parents are young
Days upon days unmarred by cancer
And other aberrations
Holding warm hands
In the brisk April air
Tight buds are blossoming
Spirits buoyed by unfettered youth
My heart is singing for joy this morning! A miracle has happened! The light of understanding has shone upon my little pupil’s mind, and behold, all things are changed!
Anne Sullivan (Helen Keller’s Teacher)
Until I was in third grade, I was invisible. I was only one of two Korean-American kids in our school (my sister was the other one), so I should have “stuck out.” But I was quiet, shy and bookish. My parents dismissed me early on as an underachiever to my more outgoing, dynamic younger sister. As most introverts do, I quietly accepted this reality.
It changed one day.
During a parent/teacher conference, my mother asked haltingly in her strong accent, “Is she OK?” I braced myself for comments about the need for improvement…in focus or math…but Ms. Meretta looked me straight in the eye and said, “Oh yes, better than OK! Caroline is my hardest worker.”
I felt an electric charge throughout my body that caused my eyes to well.
My identity underwent a dramatic transformation: I wasn’t lazy or dumb (as I had overheard). I was a hard worker. I held promise.
I’m a teacher now, and looking back, I realize Ms. Meretta would not be considered a very good teacher today. She sat at her desk the entire day, giving papers to helpers to pass out for her. She was morbidly obese and rarely moved. She allowed me to get up and read books – a LOT. I rushed through math worksheets in order to read about Ramona or even Archie. She would most likely not embrace technology or move about the room to watch progress. Most likely, she would not attend ISTE and come back with cutting edge techniques to use in the classroom.
Still, she saw me. I consider her to be my most important teacher ever. She knew my personality, my friends, my parents, my interests. She invited my mother to come in and teach my peers about Korean customs, dress and food. My mother, a housewife, was positively giddy for weeks after her presentation. She had knowledge to impart! I realized that my culture was something to be proud of, not an aspect of myself to hide.
I’m not saying that using effective teaching strategies in the classroom lack importance, but in our fast-paced, technology-driven world, we need to stop multi-tasking. We need to slow down, ask real questions (How was your gymnastics meet?) and behold the people in front of us.
My daughters and I walk into our violin teacher’s house, and the first thing we see is her 5 year old son’s newest creation: A private hide out! 
Instantly, I am transported to my childhood and I’m in a tent my sister and I make out of blankets, behind the couch. We are dirt poor, but only know the sheer pleasure of the morning sun on our faces and the taste of Pal Bubblegum which the McAllister kids give us when they come home from the grocery store. My sister and I get some raw yellow spaghetti from the kitchen as part of our secret snack. We break the stalk into matchsticks and place them in a small bowl. With crayons and a rocking chair, we create clouds of waxy confetti in the carpet and we are soundly punished for it afterwards. How we relish our hideout! Another favorite secret hangout is behind the stalks of giant sunflowers next door. We are young, free and alive! As we grew older, we created more sophisticated hideouts and games. We’d devise new Charlie’s Angels episodes and took turns being “Director.” Looking back, it was one of my first powerful, hands-on storytelling projects. I learned how to set up the scene, create a climax and conclusion and, most importantly, work with others (my sister and a friend of ours).
According to Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PhD, there are five stages to creativity: inspiration, concentration, organization, implementation and sustenance. She asserts, “Women who have lost one or more of these report that they “can’t think” of anything new, useful or empathic for themselves.” (Women Who Run with the Wolves).
Arguably, a place (or room) of your own, is essential for the concentration component of creativity. This does not have to be a home office, but it can be a favorite public hangout where you work on a consistent basis. Natalie Goldberg, author of Writing Down the Bones (and many other books and art), wrote in her favorite cafe for many years, culminating in several books on writing as well as her first novel. She had become such a fixture at the cafe, that people knew to leave her alone as she worked.
Where is your place for inspiration and creativity? If you don’t have one, think of the place you find yourself over and over again, to collect your thoughts, to write in your journal….to get things done.
Kismet 