Current symptoms: listlessness, insomnia, constant hood of worry, anxiety, pessimism, road rage
Prescription: (To do at least once a day until symptoms disappear)
Go to a mall or your sister’s house or other place where toddlers are eating or playing (a children’s playground at the park or school is not advised for you might be reported for peculiar behavior – not your fault)
Observe toddler’s feet dangling from the chair; his cherubic cheeks and glistening eyes focused on what’s in front of him;
Note the fat hands hungrily – joyfully – grabbing the sandwich/spoon/bowl;
Listen, really listen, to his easy laughter and his babble.
If you could ask him, he’d tell you:
He’s not worried about tomorrow or fretting about the past;
He’s here, with you, and nothing else matters.
When toddler begins to cry or have a temper tantrum, cease the observation and seek a quiet place immediately.
Been in need of levity and I got it. Purchased nice gifts for JiMin’s farewell party and had an impulse buy of red, wax lips. These are awesome! JiMin took great pictures of herself and the girls. They laughed hysterically before the camera. We shall miss JiMin much. She’s been great with the girls, even if she can’t clean to save her life, much less cook!
I’m busy, busy, busy with several projects. I’m preparing for the educational aspect of my career the balance of May and all of June. I’m excited about teaching creative writing and even math (in a non-conventional way) to the little ones. July will be all about the writing. I love my story and am getting great ideas every day. JiMin has played a large role in that. All sorts of issues come out when you share living quarters with a foreign exchange student!
How do you like this face? She’s been doing it all day. Very Margaret Cho!
The important thing is that you live each day as if it could be your last. Josie and Ava are hilarious. Truly. I love having summers to spend with them and watch them grow and become big people. There was a program on TV about adoption. I asked Ava, “do you know what adoption is?” She replied confidently, “yes, it’s when you give your child away to some people who don’t know how to have babies…or….they look in the tummy to see if it’s there and it’s not, there’s no baby. Or something like that.” Something like that indeed! She started so self-assuredly and knew by the end that maybe it wasn’t all correct. But shrugged her shoulders as if to say, “I’m smart and I know I have the gist of it.” Children have such a simplistic way of looking at things. I love it. As adults, we tend to look at things so seriously, with such finality and solemn sobriety. Puh-lease! And I say this mostly from personal experience…we’re too damn serious! Just play and work and hopefully, your work IS play. We’re paying people to work on our yard. We’ve never paid anyone to do anything in our yard or in our home and you know what? It’s nice. It’s OK to not do everything yourself. I’m finally learning that at 40.
I have many things on my “to do” list and they are all important. Yet, they are all unimportant too. Something like that.