family

How to Fall in Love Again

megwdige

I met my husband at a party. He made me laugh with his amazing ability to do impressions of famous people. He could do perfect Irish accents.  On one of our dates to an Irish bar in San Francisco, we met a couple Irish tourists. Willey spoke to them with an Irish brogue and they asked him which part of Ireland he was from!

It’s 22+ years later:

22 years is a long time. Nights at bars gave way to babies, cancer (and recovery), school activities, music lessons, mortgages, bills and retirement plans. The impressions and carefree days faded away. We had have responsibilities.

I threw my husband a surprise birthday party for his 50th last night.

Relatives and friends flew in from out of state. Local friends attended the party. We had a great time. One of our guests was from Australia. Suddenly, Willey was from the Outback, talking like the Crocodile Hunter. We all gathered around him, laughing. And I saw him. I saw us.

I saw our future, our hopes, our dreams, our joy.

And it all came true: We have a home, dear friends and family, beautiful children.

birthday

 

When life is ebbing instead of flowing, remember the high tide. Remember what made you fall in love. It’s always there.

 

 

 

 

Notice More

I just saw an old interview with Michael Landon. I was a HUGE fan of the Little House on the Prairie shows and I also liked Bonanza. When Landon died of cancer, the world was shocked. He announced his pancreatic cancer diagnosis and was dead less than three months later.

Something he said in his video keeps coming back to me. He said that knowing the end was near – with certainty – he “noticed” things more…about his loved ones and his life. I remember when I was diagnosed with breast cancer six years ago – although not any where as serious as Landon’s diagnosis – I was in shock and everything important in my life MAGNIFIED and irrelevant things fell to the wayside. In a way, I never felt more alive.

Since then, I’ve noticed things a little less again. I’ve gotten comfortable and I am aware of this digression.

My hope is that people will have this “awakening” long before a diagnosis. What is really important to you? WHO is important? Notice things more. Slow down.

Live like you’re going to die.

 

 

The Fugitive

 

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Josie 7/20/16

 

Come! Impropriety reigns

Spouse and children have left

oh fleeting moment of depravity (!)

shall we imbibe spirits? Cuddle on the couch?

 

You invade my thoughts all day

incompartible, inutterable desire!

unattached companions are baffled

their tastes run contrary

 

Ah! You play hard-to-get!

Your presence is fleeting

 

My tall, dark and silent one

we bid adieu until the next occasion

hauls the rest of the motley crew away

and quietude – sweet serenity – alights

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Story with a Korean Recipe

 

 

Hello dear reader,

I decided to make Saturday posts about Korean food. Even if you don’t particularly like Korean food, maybe you could still find it interesting.

Problem:  I’m not a food expert. My mother cooks the Korean food I eat. Or I go to Hodori. What can I offer my valued readers? Well, I have memories I can share with you and a recipe from a food expert (complete with citation).

The story:

It was a very horrible, no-good, very bad day. I was going to a new school. My mother had just cut my hair. I was wearing Winnie-the-Pooh overalls. I entered the class where my teacher introduced it. I was confused because right before she said my name, all the boys cheered and the girls remained silent. “Please help our new student Caroline feel welcome.” Everyone looked at each other. That’s a girl?!

Everyone pretty much ignored me that day. I ate lunch alone. There were whispers and I heard the word “Chinese” over and over again. I’m not Chinese! I wanted to yell.  I hated school.

When I came home, I was met with the warm, rich smells of mom’s cooking. She hugged me in the kitchen and put a plate of beef chun in front of me. She made some with jalapenos (for dad) and some with out (for the kids).

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Did I tell her about my day? No. I didn’t tell her about it. We didn’t do that in my family. I just ate the beef chun.

This is a high protein, delicious plate.

I love, love, love this website for Korean food. It’s published and run by a very cool Korean chick named Maangchi. She was born in Korea and knows her food. Here is her recipe for “beef pancakes” or beef chun. YUM! I will be posting recipes and stories related to vegetarian dishes, too, never fear.

 

 

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Write – Scrivi -쓰다 – 写 – escribir – γράφω

Writing it down…

  • makes an idea closer to reality.

  • creates a promise.

  • communicates ideas and feelings to others.

  • clarifies information.

  • publishes a rule or law.

  • forms a recipe or a menu.

  • extends permission.

  • announces a birth.

  • eulogizes a life.

  • expresses love.

Go back

Your message has been sent

Put That Thing Away!

Weeks ago, I came home from work to find my daughters completely immersed in “screen time.”

Screen time is commonly known as time spent on any electronic: TV, computers, tablets, hand held video games and even cell phones.

girls and me
At their most recent violin recital.

Josie, (aka Instagram Queen), was on my iPad scrolling and commenting on various pictures. Scroll, comment, scroll, comment. Ava was on her laptop watching YouTube videos of past and present winners of The Voice. They hardly looked up as I put my things away, changed my clothes and started dinner. I asked them how their day was, what happened in school…and they responded with grunts and monosyllabic answers: “Good, fine….” I noticed that I had to nudge and then nag them to practice violin, something they used to do more willingly.

So I made a decision. With husband’s agreement (it won’t work if only one parent is enforcing it), I decided to confiscate and hide all electronics until violin practice and homework had been completed. Do you know how hard it is to hide an 84″ flat screen TV?  It worked. Ava completed her homework and violin practice and then played catch with Opal in the street. Josie completed all of her work and then picked up dog poo from the backyard! They conversed with me and I learned that Ava is very fond of her new friends Lucy and Caroline at school and Josie is frustrated that her math went from an A to a B.

Ahhhhhh! I had my family back! It felt mean and terrible to do, but I’m their mother, not their friend. I cannot allow them to become Screen Time Zombies in lieu of communicative students and daughters. I encourage you to try this, at the very least, put pass codes on your devices (I did!)  and don’t allow them screen time until the work is done.

The Mother Land

Recently, I discovered that Korean refugees from North Korea are actually discriminated against in South Korea!

I couldn’t believe it. Where is the humanity? The abuse and absolute horrific treatment of North Korean civilians by their government is well-known so why would South Koreans greet them with anything but open arms?  It’s clear that education and empathy are absent.

Enter an amazing South Korean TV program called, “Now On My Way to Meet You.”  It’s an example of using media as a powerful medium for positive social change. The program first aired December of 2011 and, despite the tagline which alludes to “North Korean Beauties,” it does anything but objectify these escapees. You can read more about it and watch a clip here: Cari’s Blog. Basically, these women play games, laugh and recount their stories of life in North Korea for an enormous South Korean audience. The result?  An empathetic reaction where South Koreans are understanding and seeing these women as people.  The culture is slowly evolving into a supportive, loving one towards their sisters and brothers.

Sewol Heroes
Sewol Heroes

I have numerous cousins, aunts and uncles who live in South Korea and I have visited the country three times. In 1999, I was there for two months on an NSF research grant and I fell in love with the land and people. As news of the ferry disaster unfolded, there was a collective sigh of exasperation, shock, and anger all around me. How could this happen? The students were told to stay put? Why?!

If my father had not decided to immigrate to the United States, I could have been born and raised in South Korea. In fact, if that had happened, I would likely have been married with children a bit earlier (and who knows?)  I could have had a high school student on the ill-fated Sewol ferry and be mourning his/her death right now. These connections and possibilities only make me ponder our roles in life. I’m a teacher and I’m proud of it because I can actually impact 32 young people per year. But… can I do more? The producer of “On My Way to Meet You” has created such a critical solution to an enormous problem.  What if we all stopped asking why and started asking how? HOW can I help this situation? I think it’s a powerful question.

 

 

 

Satisfaction

valentines-001Things that have been satisfying recently:

  • Been writing 300 words every morning – OK, almost every morning. Making good progress on “David & Yeunja”, a dramatic modification to my last short story, “John E. Lee.”
  • Biore – hubby’s nose. Very satisfying.
  • Making the girls’ lunches for tomorrow.
  • Running with the dog and walking the girls home from school.
  • Passing my two AEPA tests – received official results today. I did MUCH better than I thought I did!
  • Receiving my paycheck every other Thursday.
  • Making a massage appointment (tomorrow)!
  • Waxing my brows.
  • Watching Willey play chess with Ava before dinner and….
  • Updating this blog!