*From Jim Gaffigan’s stand-up
Old Married Couple*
Marriage
Hail the Husband #4
“How do you spell moronic? Temperamental? Adjacent?”
My daughters and I often get a laugh out of my husband’s questions. We’ve learned that it hurts his feelings when we gleefully react to his earnest inquiries. So we stifle our giggles. But yesterday, he unearthed his fourth-grade report cards. And even he had to laugh…
Hail the Husband 3
He plays with her and pets her all hours of the day
talking and teasing Opal – she listens to him say
that he’s glad she’s here – wouldn’t have it any other way
and I’m happy to spot them like this through the archway
Copper
Today marks 22 years since we said, “I do.”
Faithful
Would you still love me if I was sick and dying?
Would you hold my hand all day in the hospital room while the world outside went on and on…buzzing with activity?
Would you comb my dirty hair and bring me clean underwear and ask the doctor when I am allowed to shower?
Would you give me words of love and comfort as my spirits start to wither?
Would you stay with me?
Bless This Union
This is the very best article I have ever read on marriage. It’s by Byron Katie.
If you are ready, reading this will feel like sitting in the light of truth.
It will feel like bathing in authenticity.
If you’re ready, reading this article can change all of your relationships – for the better.
My favorite line:
There’s no way to truly join your partner except by getting free of your belief that you need something from him that he’s not giving.
I was raised on conditions. I had to prove my worth in order to be loved. And I grew up and did the same to those I loved. I think this is the root of many dysfunctional relationships.
Companion Communication
He’s texting and calls out, “spell upholstery please”
I answer, “u-p-h-o-l-s-t-e-r-y”
He asks for more –
a-d-r-e-n-a-l-i-n-e
h-a-l-l-e-l-u-j-a-h
d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s
Outside, the owls – a traveling pair – coo
I wonder if she has to spell for him, too
Stay Gritty
Romantic Interlude
“What’s wrong with dad? He looks like he lost his best friend.” Josie says.
I look at my husband sitting at the end of the pool. He does look forlorn.
“Are you OK? You look sad.”
“Yeah. I’m just considering the preseason injuries the 49ers sustained. It doesn’t look good.”
“Oh well, I’m sure sitting here worrying will help,” I chuckle.
“And we have the pool cover on wrong.”
“I’ll help you turn it over.”
“And I’m still fat*. I look in the mirror and I just don’t want to be this fat.”
“Why don’t you exercise? Make it fun?”
“No, it’s too hot for fun.”
“OK, Eeyore. Have it your way.”
We both laugh.
*see post about his weight loss. He’s lost over 15 lbs in the past two months!
The Year of Copper
Today is our 21st wedding anniversary.
The other night, my husband, my mother and I, were in our swimming pool under a full moon.
William pointed at shining orbs in the inky sky. “That’s Jupiter and look..that’s Venus.” Mom stared and said, “I didn’t know that!”
He takes the telescope out, located the planets and asks her to come out of the pool to look at them. With some adjustments, she sees them. The full moon, especially, astounds her.
I wonder if she’s ever looked through a telescope before.
They marvel at the planets.
I marvel at them.
I’m working in his office just for the balance of summer. It’s kinda nice…
Kismet 
