love

Authentic Beauty

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Brigitte Tohm

“For old people, beauty doesn’t come free with the hormones, the way it does for the young… It has to do with who the person is.”

Ursula K. Le Guin

If you want to be a truly beautiful person, be kind:

  • be patient in traffic (Road Rage offends other drivers as well as your passenger(s));
  • call a friend and invite them to a bike ride, or a walk…or lunch;
  • take the time to counsel a young person who requests your advice;
  • volunteer to help your community in an area of need;
  • give thoughtful gifts because you thought of her…or him…just because;
  • tell each person you love how you feel and that you appreciate them;
  • write a love note and send it

Bereavement

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I thought I had Byron Katie’s philosophy on death mastered. Consider death differently. Let go of stressful thoughts. It’s egoic to want someone to still be alive if they died. No one dies “too soon.” Resisting reality only causes pain. Yes, I get that.

But then a very good friend passed away today and I can’t help but cry and feel the loss of his physical presence. Someone who gave so much of himself is now gone. How to reconcile this?

Tomorrow is a new day. His children and his wife will feel his absence. We all will. As Katie says, life is a recycling circuit. Nothing happens too soon. Everything happens “just right” and I must trust this is true, even though it doesn’t feel that way right now.