“Accountability” sounds like such hard work. It sounds like a burden with lots of risks. In actuality, it is liberating and empowering. When you hold yourself accountable for your actions (and inactions), you practice self-realization and increase self-awareness.
“If you need ‘likes’ on your social media account, you are in pain. Because … you are asking someone else to give you the value…to tell you how much you are worth. And as long as you are in pain, you’re going to act unconsciously.”
Gary Zukav, www.seatofthesoul.com
“Our life is shaped by our mind.”
“If you had everything in the material world (ambition, power, money), would that bring you happiness?
Go back in time when you got something you really wanted. Were you happy? How long did it last?
You can be happy without anything achieved through ambition. So why not skip that step and just be joyous?”
“If someone else can decide what will happen within you right now, isn’t that the ultimate slavery?”
“He’s a narcissist and he’s dating that whore.”
This is something she said for over eight years. Eight years. She wore bitterness on her sleeves, she spoke of her ex-husband – their father – like this openly. In her desire to vent and let her ego shine, she cast a dark shadow on her sons.
What she didn’t realize was that she had no control over his actions, but she DID (and still does) have control over her own thoughts and actions. When we get angry about the words and actions of others, we have just placed manacles on our own words and actions. We have become slaves to others, allowing our moods to be swayed by them.
It doesn’t have to be that way. Kiss your ex goodbye, wish him well and move on.
“When they go low, we go to the polls.”
“Stop comparing yourself to other people.”
These are just a few notable quotes from her commemoration speech to graduates at USC’s Annenberg School of Communication and Journalism graduation ceremony.
Salma Hayek told Oprah a story: When she was 10, there was a neighborhood flasher. This man accosted her and exposed his full frontal nudity. “I was terrified, just so scared…” She went home and told her grandmother who then gave this advice (Hayek offered a disclaimer – she is by no means telling little girls they ought to do this) BUT…
“The next time that man flashes you – even if you are terrified and alone – LAUGH at him. Point at his groin and LAUGH.”
The man DID flash her again. And little Salma stopped. She felt her entire body tighten with fear. But she remembered her grandmother’s advice. So she stared, pointed at his groin and laughed.
“He ran away, he cowered and ran away!” Hayek says, still incredulous.
You can always choose to reclaim your power.
Artists are powerful because they appeal to people’s hearts and minds. Painters, sculptors, writers, musicians and other artists are changemakers. Writers, for example, can be drivers for social equity.
Two Asian actors in “Hawaii Five-O” just left the show. When they signed on, they were the big names. No one really knew the two white lead actors (Alex O’Loughlin and Scott Caan). Daniel Dae Kim was coming from “Lost” and Grace Park was famous for her work in “Battlestar Galactica.” The Asian actors were really the draw for the show. Now, seven years later, the Asian actors are still not making as much money as the lesser known leads.
NPR had an intriguing and informative interview with writer Rick Najera and Jeff Yang (podcast host). Najera made the assertion that the power lies in the hands of the writers:
NAJERA: The writers’ room can decide whether that actor is a supporting actor or a leading actor. So it’s very easy to make that decision. So you can sit there and say, well, we have two Asian actors on a show set in Hawaii, which is predominately very Asian, let’s make them leads. They can make that decision early on. I think Hollywood’s kind of catching up to that thought and wants to. It’s just everyone in Hollywood wants to be second, no one wants to be first.
I believe artists outside of Hollywood – the independent filmmakers and artists – are the people who will make (are making) this happen.
Be the first!
There’s power in “no.” Saying no to boring parties, mindless gossip and other wasteful diversions will save you valuable time and energy. Just make sure that while you say “no,” you are saying “yes” to something constructive or restorative.